Friday, July 02, 2010

Saved Again: "Conditionally"

"Could you ever marry someone who's not Catholic?" I asked my husband while we were still dating.

No, he couldn't.

"So here we go again," I thought at the time.

So after some classes on Catholic teachings (the communion bread is really Jesus and dogs don't really go to heaven), I had to get RE-baptized--"conditionally" this time, just in case the first one didn't take.

You see, in all the confusion, I couldn't remember if my first attempt at it amounted to what the Catholics call a "Trinitarian" baptism. I just couldn't recall as the pastor dunked me in the swimming pool if he'd said the words, "In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit," a point about which the Catholics are very particular. I actually had to go through the humiliation of writing Johnny the Pastor an email in Iceland and had to be all like, "Hey, did you specify 'father, son, and holy spirit?" And he was all like, "Becoming Catholic is a big mistake and I renounce you. So there." So I had to forward this email to the Catholics, who said under the circumstances, I had to have a do-over. Not just a do-over, but a "conditional" do-over.

I've often wondered how much God really cares about semantics. And does he take into account when a person is "converted" to a religion by love or dominance? (Or both?)

And I often wonder now why I was attracted to men who only wanted me...the way they wanted me. Conditionally.

I know that my God doesn't love that way.

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0 Things not left unsaid: